John 21

So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.” He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” vv.15-17

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The Lord asks Peter three times if he loves Him.  In the English we can't see all that is really going on here and brings a little more insight to this passage.  In Jesus' first two questions He uses the Greek word agape for love.  Agape is the highest form of love, a self-sacrificing love.  Yet Peter responds with the Greek word phileo for the type of love he said he had for the Lord.  Phileo is more like a friendship kind of love.  Peter at one point was this boisterous disciple and would've claimed without thinking of his agape love towards the Lord, but after realizing how he denied the Lord when Jesus was taken to be crucified he seems ashamed and no longer can live up to the claim he thought he once was.  But then Jesus asks a third time if Peter loves Him yet this time Jesus uses the phileo word for love asking if Peter loves Him as a friend.  All this probably played into his guilt of not only denying his master, his Lord but his friend too.  He knew deep down he really did love Jesus, but was so disappointed in himself.  The Lord’s questions had brought Peter to the point of his dilemma.  He had failed the Lord, and utterly failed to show forth love for Him.  Now, Peter can no longer view himself as the great disciple who will be loyal no matter what.  Now, he must look at himself realistically, as just a man who can be used by the Lord.  And now, the Lord has a mission for him.  He wants him to feed His sheep. (Bible Teacher Nathan Johnson)  Do you agape and phileo the Lord?  How do you know?  How can you still let the Lord use you despite having let Him down at some or many points in your life?